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The phrase sounds almost laughably simple when you say it out loud: “I am allowed to take up space.” Yet for the past few days, as I’ve been practicing this affirmation internally, I’ve noticed something remarkable; an actual shift in how I move through the world.

Maybe it’s the year I’ve spent focusing on body sensations, or the growing awareness of my nervous system regulation as I notice the restriction or expansion in my chest when making decisions. Whatever the catalyst, this simple self worth affirmation about taking up space has become a key that’s unlocking parts of myself I didn’t even realize were locked away.

The Shell I Built Around Myself

It started during a trail walk, where I’d been visualizing the person I want to become. Not the external trappings or possessions, but how I want to show up in the world and how I want to feel. This practice made me acutely aware of how far I’d drifted from that vision.

The last few years, I’d essentially become a hermit. After years as a barber working closely with people, I’d retreated into isolation, working diligently on building an online income that would allow me to travel and work remotely. But somewhere along the way, I recognized the need for overcoming people pleasing habits, which then became less about healthy boundaries and more about hiding from the world entirely.

I’d built a protective shell around myself, driven by fear of other people’s judgment. Mental stories accumulated from years of mishaps, each one chipping away at my confidence until I was paralyzed by the assumption that everyone was thinking the worst of me.

The evidence seemed overwhelming: years of living with no boundaries, allowing others to take full advantage of my kindness, had created a catalog of experiences that my subconscious used to justify these fears.

The Exhausting Dance of People-Pleasing

Creating personal boundaries became necessary once stepping into people pleaser recovery to counter constantly shrinking myself to appease everyone I encountered. I developed this unconscious habit of “feeling out” how much of myself I could safely reveal to new people; an exhausting dance of calculated authenticity.

Once I got comfortable with someone and started letting my guard down, my true self would emerge. But even then, I maintained a slight defensive posture, ready to retreat at the first sign of someone’s displeasure.

Here’s what I’ve learned: hiding your authentic self isn’t just unfair to you, it’s unfair to everyone you meet. You’re essentially depriving the world of your unique gifts and perspectives.

While plenty of people understand the challenge of being rejected for simply being yourself- being told you’re “too much” or whatever variation of that criticism- there’s always the other side of the coin. The right people will absolutely connect with who you really are.

Choosing Your Hard

This realization led me to what I call “choosing your hard.” You can choose the hard of being denied certain relationships when you show up authentically, or you can choose the hard of never truly finding your authentic self- as you don’t allow people to know who you really are.

Both paths involve difficulty, but only one leads to genuine connection and fulfillment. For deeper people pleasing patterns or if you feel like you’ve tried everything and nothing is working online-therapy can be a great option for help in uncovering what may be hidden.

The Physical Sensation of Worthiness

When I began incorporating the self worth affirmation “I am worthy of taking up space,” something shifted in my chest- that area where I’d become so closed off that restriction felt normal. As I practiced truly meaning these words, I could feel the tightness ease, like a weight being lifted.

There’s an actual expansion in my ribcage, in what some might call the heart chakra area. Throughout my body, I feel something I haven’t experienced in years: a sense of pride in where I am right now, exactly as I am.

This self worth affirmations practice involves several key elements:

• Accepting and receiving ownership of myself
• Staying calm instead of rushing when I feel that instinctual fear of “being in the way”
• Remaining present and focused on the exact moment
• Choosing kindness over niceness, seeing myself as an equal
• Catching myself when I judge others and remembering that I won’t be everyone’s cup of tea

The Courage to Go Deeper

The deeper I dive into these underlying patterns, the more vulnerable I feel—but I’ve learned this vulnerability is exactly what’s required to address persistent problems at their root.

Nervous system regulation techniques have taught me the importance of being truthful with myself, allowing myself to understand and relate to the real fears beneath surface-level reactions. I’d been gaslighting myself for so long that simply acknowledging my own reasoning became a process in itself.

I’d spent years trying to appear strong, feeling compelled to hide what was really happening beneath the surface. The fear of appearing helpless, weak, or worthless drove me to push away truth before I could fully examine it.

It was as if admitting the real reasons for my behavior would somehow disqualify me from being the person I thought I should be. But that raises the fundamental question: who decides who I am or should be?

The answer, of course, is me. I’m the one who decides, because ultimately, no one else’s opinion matters as much as my own understanding of myself.

Breaking Free from Society’s Expectations

What works for each of us depends on our unique chemistry and circumstances. Being suppressed by societal expectations of what’s “normal” often means absorbing messages from advertisements and unconscious cultural programming- old ways of thinking that once seemed like the only options.

But here we are in 2025, with our own functioning minds and countless opportunities that previous generations couldn’t have imagined.

The biggest battle we face is often with ourselves. I’m learning that the deeper you dive into self-understanding, the better your overall self-perception becomes. It’s a marathon, not a sprint, and the journey includes milestones that can feel destabilizing.

The key is adapting to your surroundings while holding yourself accountable and standing firm in your evolving beliefs.

Understanding the Flow of Emotions

Nervous system regulation techniques have taught me that understanding your emotions is crucial for maintaining reasonable progress. Emotions flow like water- we can’t control exactly what surfaces, but we do have the opportunity to let them move through us rather than getting stuck.

We can choose to respond to emotions rather than react instantly. Feeling any particular way doesn’t make you a bad person, but you also don’t have to remain in discomfort longer than necessary.

Research suggests that 90 seconds is typically enough time to fully feel and release an emotion without attaching to it or carrying it in your energetic state.

Rewriting Internal Stories

The fears we create from our internal narratives are often far worse than reality. This simple phrase- “I am worthy of taking up space,” represents my next step in allowing myself to be open to re-entering the world in this reborn state.

For me, this self worth affirmation means being enough to exist wherever I am. It means my choices and decisions are acceptable for me to pursue, even if others might disapprove. It comes with a sense of inherent worth that counteracts the mental story that I’m somehow less than the people around me.

This shift has given me hope and openness to take steps that I believe will be beneficial, even when they feel scary.

Building New Habits in Simple Steps

I’m starting small, building resistance and creating new habits through basic, everyday practices. When passing people during walks, when facing decisions that would typically send me spiraling through scary “what if” scenarios, this statement brings me back to myself and allows me to interject myself into the bigger picture.

The beauty of self worth affirmations is their simplicity and accessibility. You don’t need special equipment or extensive training- just a willingness to be honest with yourself about what you need to hear.

Your Personal Worthiness Statement

This particular phrase might not be the right one for your journey, and that’s perfectly okay. The important thing is taking time to sit with yourself and ask: What am I truly worried about, and how can I reframe my relationship with my own worthiness?

Personal boundaries look different for everyone, but it always starts with the radical idea that you deserve to take up space in this world- not apologetically, not conditionally, but simply because you exist.

Your authentic self isn’t something you need to earn the right to express. It’s your birthright, and the world needs what you have to offer.

Key Takeaways for Your Journey

• Start with your body: Notice where you feel restriction or expansion when making decisions
• Practice daily affirmations: Find a self worth affirmation that resonates with your specific needs
• Choose your hard: Decide whether you’d rather face rejection for being authentic or regret for never trying
• Give emotions space: Allow feelings to move through you rather than getting stuck
• Question your stories: Challenge the assumptions your mind creates about others’ opinions
• Take small steps: Build new habits through simple, everyday practices

The path to finding your authentic self isn’t about becoming someone new- it’s about burning down the old protective walls and allowing what’s always been there to finally breathe. You are worthy of taking up space, exactly as you are, right now.

Ready to Start Your Own Transformation?

If this resonates with you and you’re ready to begin your own journey from people-pleasing to authentic self-expression, I’ve created something special to help you get started.

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This isn’t just another generic self-help download. It’s a carefully crafted collection of tools I wish I’d had when I started this journey:

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 🌊 Nervous System Regulation Techniques you can use anywhere, anytime 

🔥 “Burning Down the Old Self” Guided Process for releasing what no longer serves you 

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This pack is designed to meet you exactly where you are—whether you’re just starting to question your people-pleasing patterns or you’re ready to make some serious changes.

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Your authentic self is waiting. The only question is: are you ready to take up the space you’ve always deserved?

Drop a comment below and let me know: What’s one way you’re going to practice taking up space this week? Your story might be exactly what someone else needs to hear.

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